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This is Nuts!

Back in the 80's, there was a certain local man who died. While he spent the last year of his life in a nursing home, his wife began frequenting a dance hall at the state line. Perhaps you can blame it on the alcohol, but in spite of her age this elderly lady began entering wet t-shirt contests. It is said she even won a couple of them. When her husband died, a certain funeral home took some metal folding chairs over to the widow's home so the many family and friends who would be stopping by to pay their respects would have a place to sit. The funeral director arrived and set as many chairs in the living room as he could. He had a few left over and the widow instructed him to store them in an adjacent bedroom. As he went to open the bedroom door, the man noticed a picture of Jesus on the door. He entered the bedroom looking for a place to put the extra chairs. The room was crowded so he decided to put the chairs in the corner behind the door. When he shut the door from the inside, he saw it. The very same door that had the photo of Jesus on one side, had a bumper sticker on the other side that read, "Tight butts drive me nuts!"

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